December 18, 2019

9:25 a.m. In the story of the first Christmas, the shepherds are described as ‘keeping watch’, and that is something I definitely need to work on. I have never been what you might call ‘a watchful person’ – never very good at actually watching carefully exactly what’s happening right now. I’m a fairly distractible fellow, my mind always going here, there, and everywhere, no matter what might be happening or what I might be doing. Today, I hope to be as ‘watchful’ as a good shepherd, for indeed all the coming moments today deserve to be noticed and cared for, as if each moment is a harmless and loving lamb that deserves to be attentively observed and safeguarded, as if it is very special, as every moment surely is.

7:14 p.m. Looking back on the day, I think I was watchful, attentive, and genuinely interested only some of the time – maybe very little of the time, actually. Once again, I got rather lost in my thoughts as the moments and hours passed. To be honest, though, I give myself credit for trying harder – working more energetically to stay in each present moment and truly appreciate every one of them. I recall two of these moments today – getting in the car and noticing, for a few moments, some dust on the floor, and noticing – looking carefully at – the veins in my hands as I sat at my computer. Each of the thousands of moments I experienced today was loaded with wonder and magic, and, to be honest, I missed most of it. But … tomorrow is another day.